look i’m full of queer thoughts (tm) right now
i just got back from my fourth Big Gay Road Trip with my queer platonic life partner, and i started my day with a phone call with a friend wrestling with transition, and i think i’m going to play gay hockey this winter, so, it’s been on my mind.
but man, the above just hit me right in my Queer Feels
because it’s what we go through, right?
we do our best to fit in with the rest of the ducks, even though we know deep down, even when we can’t explain it, that we are Not Ducks, and we feel sad and alone and unwanted because we don’t do the things that the ducks expect us to do, and - especially when we don’t quite have the words to explain why - they don’t know why we don’t do Duck Things.
even when they love us and raise us as their own they are often baffled by us and mourn when they realize that we will never be ducks.
i said to my friend this afternoon on the phone, i told them ‘you need to find genderqueer friends,’ and i think what i meant to say was ‘you need to find your queers, whoever they are,’ whether they be swans or Stitches or people who rock out with mohawks and beards and skirts, because the only reason i’m as happy and healthy as i am is because i found my queers - my queer platonic life partner and my gay husbands and my local nerd queers, the people who don’t look at my gender as an awesome act of performance but who simply love and know k8, who know what it’s like to not be a duck.
anyway. this ugly duckling is happy because they know where they belong. and Lilo & Stitch give me all the feelings, sometimes.